Ceilidh – Happy St Andrew’s Day….Again

A couple of days ago someone clicked on a post of mine where I got salty about people from The Royal Kingdom of Fife being inter-bred…

I’m related to…

Samuel Greig married Sarah (1752–1793), daughter of Alexander Cook. Their union would give rise to children and grandchildren who later married into the Russian and German nobility.

Mmmn. In the 20th century the Greig’s and the Cook’s married again.

My Dad’s sister, Joy, married Archie Cook. Both of them local.

They had three daughters and the last time I went to a full Scottish Ceilidh was their eldest daughter, Fiona’s, wedding in Kinghorn. We don’t do pompous. FUN and Family are the Name of the Game

OMG. LOTS of men in kilts. Lots of music. Lots of dancing. My Dad even asked me for a dance but I was 8 months pregnant with my first son and felt like a heffalump. I couldn’t even toast the bride with a dram :o(

Arse – nal

Mmmn. I’m an arse and also an Arsenal fan.

If that’s not embarrassing enough – I just commented somewhere about a tet- anus prick in my bum.

Double-entendres galore.

Today was meant to be POETS DAY but HE is back on a 3 week stint of Emergency Rescue so he couldn’t piss off early tomorrow is saturday.

C’est la vie and que sera.

Responding to Hecklers is an ART. These two do it so well :o)

Ahem – who is top of the Premier League table right now ? ? ?

Chicken Soup For The Soul

I’m a fricking Genius.

By accident , may I add?

The slow cooker is paying for itself already. Yesterday I cooked a chicken in it and had the foresight to leave all the juicy juices, chicken stock and leftovers in said pot.

Why?

I NEED CHICKEN SOUP FOR MY SOUL.

Jackie recipe :

Randomly dice up one onion, a few carrots, a few potatoes and fry them gently in olive oil for some time. Add the juices from the crockpot plus more Chicken Oxo cube stock and a splash of herbes de provence. Simmer until all the veg is tender.

Let the pan cool, add a few chunks of rescued chicken then bash it all about a lot with a whizzy thing until you get a smooth something – I had to add a bit of milk here to help the whizz.

Season to taste. Lots of salt and pepper.

Fry off some bacon lardons. Add to the mix.

I have some double cream to hand and may go a bit creamy when I add the rest of the chicken and reheat everything about 5pm.

MANNA.

I’d make a brilliant TV cook :o)

I Use Tagliatelle : My Choice

When traveller-in-crime and I went to Italy – Rome and Venice – I was DETERMINED to eat authentic, made-on-the-spot Italian food. And I did :o)

Apart from the pizza. It was mass-produced and frozen. Said so on the box that we took back to the hotel room for a midnight snack.

The BEST meal I had was a Carbonara. On the street. From a restaurant less than 5 minutes walk from the hotel.

Droooool!

I always use tagliatelle. Dunno why. And bacon……..we don’t have an Italian butcher close by. And parmigiano reggiano. From Tesco.

MY kids love it too. Good job. We have it for tea tonight :o)

Did I just drool again?

Nichola de la Haie

She’s a bit of a hero of mine. A local girl.

Sherriff of Nottingham? Nah. Nichola was Sherriff of the WHOLE OF LINCOLNSHIRE.

I’ve see the Magna Carta here. And walked the battlements trying to envisage just how Nichola defended her castle from the enemy.

Quite easily actually. The view is awesome. On a clear day we can see Lincoln Cathedral from here – 21 miles away. And the castle is just opposite the Cathedral.

Note to Self : Build your Castle/Home up on high ! ? !

Thank you, Neil :o)

The Holy Grail but NOT As Y’all Know It.

Done this absolute true life thing too many times before.

MY first viewing of this film was on a night duty at Checkpoint Bravo in Berlin.

This was the entrance into Berlin from Checkpoint Alpha in Helmstedt (did duty there too!) via what we called The Corridor. Which was a long autobahn with no speed limits. YAY. Drove it. Scared myself stupid at over 100 miles an hour.

At Bravo there was a long desk. Us Brits (two) were at the beginning. Two US MP in the middle. Two French MP at the end of the desk.

Mick – my oppo – brought in a portable TV one night and we all watched.

Mick and I were laughing.

The US were sneering.

The French ignored us all :o)

Weird Patterns : From Sparta to Scotland

I watched 300 and had to smile. I had no idea who Gerard Butler was but his Scottish accent kept slipping through.

Himself (the man about the house) just threw me googly by saying that he ACTUALLY missed eating Jock Pies.

Jock Pies recipe.

We used to be able to buy them here, in town. I said WTF? I grew up on them.

When Lily and I went to get the messages, she’d always buy us a Scotch/Jock Pie from the Butcher. Or Baker. Sheesh. It was a long while ago :o)

I’ve made my own but…..:o(

Good Riddance…

…To BAD RUBBISH

Latest from the Home Front. We are getting our 4th wheelie bin. It’ll be black with a purple lid.

Yay.

I’ve already forgotten why.

At least we have a 2 acre garden. Imagine those with no garden and 4 wheelie bins.

Heyho.

BTW – I’m now an ex-truther. Unsubbed from all the rubbish.

Time of my LIFE :o)

Taking the Pith

I watch Hannah on and off.

If I had my time again this would be me.

How the eff does she have a Landrover Defender – long wheel base? And a UK one?

When mine had to be sold. Not Jealous…ok – Off the scale Jealous.

I can build too. And COOK. And live alone in the woods – with friends coming over to help.

P.S. Pith?

My childhood was spent with my Dad’s Pith Helmet always showing up somewhere in the house. With a loud verbal warning – DO NOT TOUCH.

P.P.S. Very DRY, Very COLD White Wine and a ton of olives, thanks.

:o)

The Misfits

No. Not the film with Marilyn Munroe, Eli Wallach and Clark Gable.

Me and BFF.

We were thrown together aged 11 at Qegs and are still BFFs.

2 and a half hours later on the phone we’ve covered the good, the bad and the ugly.

Misfits? Yup. Landed in rural Lincolnshire, daughters of a Royal Marine and an RAF pilot.

Bugger the bad and the ugly – we had so much fun on with the good.

For 3 years our class was relegated to porta-cabins. Outside of the main building. Why….?

Somewhere in the shit would be either me, Karen or Alex. Or worse – all of us. The dark, the blonde and the redhead.

Hey, Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.

Way back then – fun was NOT #banned. Even the teachers found us quite entertaining. Perfect DETENTION fodder :o)

Write out 500 lines – Stupid is as stupid does.

The four pens sellotaped together worked every time :o)

Lovejoy

About 10 years ago, myself and my eldest were all alone here for weeks as everyone else was in the Middle East doing the boots on the ground thing.

I’ve spent so many birthdays alone and my boy knew this. So that late November morning I woke up to a HUGE box on the kitchen table.

The boy had gone through my Amazon Wishlist and bought me my wishes. One of which was the entire box set of all Lovejoy episodes.

I cried.

It’s taken this long for anyone else in the house to actually sit down and watch this much loved programme of mine.

This morning I was treated to three whole episodes on the Drama Channel without a single side comment. Yay. Progress.

Not including the episode below, though. Which “stars” the man who played Cliff Barnes in Dallas. OMG. I’m THAT old ?

Whimper.

:o(

I’m a Suicide Survivor. Here’s What I Learned. (It’s uplifting, I promise.)

I’ve had so much respect for Cathy Hay for a long time. Her videos have both helped and bamboozled me over the years.

She is best known as a seamstress/sewer/tailor/creator of garments/clothing historian.

Why did she connect with me so well? How did I understand or even recognise that innate sadness deep inside?

BTW – I never saw any bright lights or welcoming faces. I saw only a darkness too deep and too terrifying ever to give in to it. My place was HERE. Despite my inability to cope with the pain of living. Dying is easy….living is hard.

God’s Honest Truth.

Dancing in the Moonlight

The “mad, bad, dangerous to know” girl (my favourite traveller-in-crime) & I danced in the moonlight a few times. Paris. Rome. Dubai. Venice. On a plane. In a car in the Chunnel. In wales. On my kitchen table…………

The most memorable was about 2am. In Dubai. Walking from the bar to our rooms. Via the swimming pool.

Our feet were hot so we danced in the shallow end. Kicking water at each other.

Aaah. The crazy things we do.

Happy Birthday – my gorgeous girl :o)

The THEY Call Me Midas

but…But…BUTT…I’m not the person in year 3/4 still demanding a MEELYON$ from a certain yt channel.

What he’s done to bring that on him is not my business. But something WAS done that PROVOKED a blackmail.

If you don’t do xyz, I WILL DO ZYX.

Nowt to do with me. I’m a giver not a taker. And I’ve NEVER BLACKMAILED anyone in my life.

Some have tried it on me. I came back with the good old – PROVE IT.

And they Ran AWAY. Like a flock of seagulls denied a free meal

:o)

We have Love-Joy-Midas-Music-Seagulls-COWARDS here.

Jim Leonard, Lovejoy’s old mentor, asks for his help in a plot to sting greedy Dutch art dealer Hans Koopman, who once cheated Jim’s wife’s Judy’s late father. At a weekend house party where Tinker poses as a lord and Eric as a gentleman farmer, they persuade Koopman to buy a fake Klimt painting in exchange for a parcel of diamonds, but on Monday morning Lovejoy discovers that Koopman is not the only person whom the Leonards have deceived.

Look & learn. Or not. YOUR CHOICE, mes not-so-braves.

I-RAN. Our Iranian friends are back in touch. The father and the daughter. Constant comms. FACT!

Divinely Feminine

OhMy. The girl has gone all pink and girly today

I’m making a divine pink, flowery, embroidered, ruffled, floaty wrap over dress out of some stunning Cotton Lawn.

Cotton Lawn is not as fine or sheer as muslin but it’s not far off.

After sewing with linen for so long, it feels like I’m stitching on cobwebs :o)

We are so hecking la-de-dah about fabrics today. They are as common as air and wind and rain and only really thought about when they are in short supply (?)

No-one likes frost-bite or sunburn. Hey ?

Learning New Skills

I’m feeling very S M U G today.

For about 2 weeks George, the car, has had no water in the windscreen water washer thingy.

Yup. I’ll do it tomorrow.

Ditto

Yup. I’ll do it tomorrow.

Sigh.

So I did it. Bearing in mind that I had no idea how to get under the bonnet of a very old Ford Mondeo. FIRST job to figure out.

Flip the badge on the radiator grill, insert ignition key, half turn left followed by half turn right.

Couldn’t be simpler!!!!!

Then youngest son came out and “helped.”

We need more oil, Mother. More stuff for the radiator (?) and something else that went right over my head and into never-neverland.

Clarkson, May & Hammond would be proud of me…..LMFAO :p

P.S. Running out of fuel was a chargeable offence in H.M. Forces. Fact!

MY WEAKNESS!

I was given a present this morning….some one KNOWS my fatal weakness.

Y’all can keep your Eclairs, Profiteroles, Gateaux, Danish Pastries etc.

THIS will make me go weak at the knees and binge eat.

Best with a good amount of salted butter and/or Extra Mature
Cheddar.

My Dad always said that you could tell a perfect Mature Cheddar – it makes your teeth itch :o)

Whirling Dervish

I may be incorrect here but – my one brain cell seems to remember that Sufism is the only branch of Islam that venerates both dance and music.

Please, feel free to put me right if I’m wrong!

I’ve seen a Dervish dance. In the Arabian Desert.

It’s extremely hypnotic and enhancing to witness the dance of man and music and energy and totality in reality.

My entire life has been touched by music and dance and I seem to have connected with my inner SUFI :o)

Heaven – I’m In Heaven

I was #destroyed by certain family members for my love of leggings.

Hey, gals. Once you’ve given birth, you need comfort, yes.

I’ve worn them for years. Until about 5 years ago. When mine kinda fell apart in the wash.

:o(

I’ve just received an Amazon delivery of leggings. Which I will wear under a dress and with my bovver boots.

Stylish as…….when I was a youngster.

Jeebus. What goes around, comes around.

I’m BACK IN FASHION. Yay :o)

So comfortable and forgiving. #iloveleggings

The Schism : Alive & Kicking Butt. Woohoooooo!

Way back in late 2019/early 2020 I told two fabby famous content creators that there was a Schism coming up and that I was a huge part of that.

WTF – 3 years ago?

Anyhoo. The Schism is well and truly here and PUBLIC. Not just me being a snarky bitch all over yt.

Sita/Woody/EwarAnon. These are heavy hitters. Unlike multi-banned and ignored me.

But – the News of the Screws all say that they’ve been “threatened” or “paid off” or “shills” or whateverandwhatever.

Thanks guys.

Heartfelt thanks :o)

Sir Thomas Malory

As you can see from my wonky picture above – I have an interest in the likes of Malory.

His most famous work is Le Morte d’Arthur.

I can go scholarly or Sarcastic. Both are valid.

Oh. It’s a rare and wonderful sight to find another with a slight interest in stuff that fascinates me.

P.S. I RARELY wear green. “On this earth but not of it” ? ? ?

Woven Air : The Ancient Fabric That No One Knows How To Make

As a young teenager, my favourite piece of clothing was a cheesecloth shirt. I wore it to death!

I have a few metres of striped cheesecloth now for shirt, dressmaking. Sigh.

I love cheesecloth. So 1970’s.

It’s also called Muslin and was once so finely woven that it was known as Garment of the Wind.

Dhaka Muslin.

Though Dhaka muslin vanished more than a century ago, there are still intact saris, tunics, scarves and dresses in museums today. Occasionally one will resurface at a high-end auction house such as Christie’s and Bonhams, and sell for thousands of pounds.

How about a revisit to the Emperor With No Clothes?

POETS DAY : The Lady of Tartary

I did this one three years ago. But I’ll self-ref without shame.

In the little back bedroom of my Nan’s house, my room, there was space enough for a single bed and a bookcase. On the bookcase were all of my Mum’s childhood books. Blyton, Kingsley, A.A. Milne, Ransome, Walter Scott and Walter de la Mare.

I once sent a snarky reply to The Tartarian Princess on yt. She exclaimed that she was waiting for her Tartarian Prince.

I said that a Tartarian Princess didn’t need a prince. She could rule all on her. Like Tamar of Georgia.

No wonder I keep getting banned. LMFAO :o)

Forget the word LORD and inject the word LADY (?)

Why is Cottagecore so Gay?

OOOPS!

I must’ve been “Gay” all my life and never knew it.

That’s a bummer.

I’ve done ALL that Rowan describes, all of my life.

OK. That’s me out of the wardrobe.

I AM OFFICIALLY A GAY FEMALE & SLIGHTLY QUEER TOO!

I’m also a huge Agatha Christie fan and she uses “GAY” to mean happy & “QUEER” to mean strange.

BTW : When I was 6 years old and we had to live with Nan for a while before moving to Scotland, I gathered all the fallen petals from her roses and squished them into a jar of water – to make rose water.

I made a jar full of stinky sludge :o)

Muntjac, Deer Friends

Apparently, so I’ve been told, these beautiful, shy, very quiet and skitty deer are now classed as VERMIN and available to be killed at any time by anyone.

A bit like my MacGregor family under government proscription a few centuries back.

the name of Gregor or MacGregor … that every such person or persons assuming or taking to themselves the said name … shall incur the pain of death which pain shall be executed upon them without favour.

Fluffing Elite Tossers.

Yes. They eat the bark off some trees but a bit of chicken fixes that. (The deer, that is. Not Clan Gregor or Tossers!!!!??)

We get them in our garden. I had one at six a.m. this morning right in front of me as I did the washing up. She was a tiny doe. We watched each other in silence and stillness for ages. Then I waved at her and she ran.

Sigh.

Most of them, even the bucks, are not even as tall as our German Shepherd was.

Sweet :o)

BIG Beds & A Genius Brainwave

Aha! Problem solved by my leetle grey cell :o)

When eldest son hit 6ft 6ins tall and constantly complained about having backache every morning, his mother took pity on him.

Having a huge SuperKing Sized Bed (6ft wide and 6ft 6 ins long) she gifted it to him and reclaimed the old normal, Victorian bedstead double bed back. Ain’t she sweet!?

Being a lad and having no appreciate of the pure linen SuperKing bedclothes that I’d bought years ago, said son shoved them all in the airing cupboard.

PURE LINEN.

The pile above will soon (?) become some spiffy clothes for his mother.

Sometimes I amaze myself :o)

I Have A SECRET Love…Again!

Rachel is so like me in so many ways.

I’ve spent the whole of last week watching her complete madness on yt. She makes me feel soooooo NOT ALONE anymore :o)

Yep. She buys into the WWW stupids going on. But I can forgive her everything when I watch.

And she’s teaching me to be much less of a Perfect Penelope when it comes to sewing.

Even HIMSELF fell in love with her this morning.

OMG. Schwoon.

It’s the red hair.

ALWAYS the red hair!

Supermarket Singing

I had a lovely experience this morning in the shop.

A while back there’s a post here called something like “How to Embarrass Your Offspring” – I did this by singing along to Roxy Music in the aisles.

Today it was Rod Stewart. And a man totally embarrassing his wife

She did the flappy arm thing at him. I grinned.

Rod Stewart is not a singer that I like but…his songs seem to’ve stuck with me.

Happy V Day :o)

The Broons & Oor Wullie

Oh. My. What?

I felt all brave yesterday and went up into the attics to find my “inheritance.”

That would be the cardboard box with all our old family mementos in.

Effing cobwebs. Effing buckets full of water. Effing other people putting their crap on top of everyeffingthing.

It’s only a small box. I couldn’t find it :o(

Where are we going with this? Well. I’m making a series of “journals/books” to hold all these precious items from my parents and both sets of grandparents. For my grandchildren – when my boys stop picking certain types women as partners. Tttccch.

There isn’t one of my many Oor Wullie comics in there – sadly. But I just wanted to reconnect with my lost loved ones.

Sigh.

Mad. Bad. & Dangerous To Know

I adore Byron.

I adore this quote about him.

The Big Bear reminds me of George Byron – in essence but not actuality – MB&DTK.

This world needs people who kick the “normal” out of shape. They usually do it naturally and willingly because that was why they were born. And they know this.

As Rumi said : “Run from what’s comfortable. Forget safety. Live where you fear to live. Destroy your reputation. Be notorious. I have tried prudent planning long enough. From now on I’ll be mad.”

P.S. Youngest son’s new fave phrase is SPICY. It can mean hot or cold or fighting talk or ….. :o)

Gong Hei Fat Choy

Being born in Singapore and being a Water Tiger – February the 1st this year is MASSIVE for me.

Welcome to the YEAR of the TIGER :o)

BTW : 9 hours ahead of GMT…they’ve already celebrated. Via the virtual !

Enjoy this spectacular virtual fireworks to welcome the Lunar New Year – Year of the Tiger at Chinatown, Singapore. Due to the COVID-19 pandemic, there are no traditional fireworks scheduled to be let off in Singapore. So to keep spirits up, here is a virtual one to usher in the new year. Huat ah!

Stupid dem-panic :o(

Aunt Sally vs Mrs Hudson

OK. Hands up. I admit it.

It took me years to watch Ben Cucumberpatch as Sherlock.

Years.

Not only did I “believe” that he was wrong for the job but … UNA STUBBS as Mrs Hudson? ? ?

She is best known here as Aunt Sally or the prim friend of Basil Fawlty. ‘

YES. I was SO WRONG.

I watched A Study in Pink and then was incommunicado for days afterwards.

Then I watched them all again and….

MRS HUDSON DRIVES A DB9 & J.Edgar Hoover’s to Rock Music : My girl :o)

MR Word

Mr Word is my go-to every morning and every night. After Plants vs Zombies.

I effing hate/love that app!

He’s a bit of a git, Wordy. But I’m still winning :o)

Words, Words, Words as Hamlet said.

Sometimes I make up a word and still win points.

Scrabble aka Alfred’s Game.’

P.S. Sneaky Tactic – Mr Word does not know the word QI as in the Chinese for Chi. I get him every time with that one…fact !

FIRESTARTER

We have had a few deliveries today.

Only one was mine. The rest were …..never mind.

We had TONS of cardboard.

Eldest son is the FIRESTARTER in our garden fire pit.

Both of them LOVED this song when it first came out.

Eldest sang that LINE to me today…… :o)

Sweet Little Lies

Not only will my gorgeous friend be here next week, but also her baby brother.

We had so much in common at 11 years old. Fathers in the military. Two younger brothers exactly the same age.

Her little brother is travelling from Mostar in Serbia/Bosnia/Yugoslavia as I type for his step-mother’s funeral.

I told my girl that I’d LOVE to see him again…he agreed.

The link?

The step-mother and Fleetwood Mac on MAX VOL all day in the house.

That family musically programmed me :o)

Mayhem in the BubbleBath

I watched this yesterday and we got into a conversation.

You know how it goes…

…D’ya remember when you were stupid enough to put bubbles in the jet bath?

Eeer. Yes. We were both crying with laughter the night it happened :o)

I’m a bubblebath fan. Always have been. MY TIME with hot water, bubbles, a few drops of essential oils. DOOR LOCKED against all intruders with two legs or four legs!

By the time it had reached critical mass in a Burj Khalifa bathroom and my squeals were beginning to annoy, he ran in and screamed at me. TURN THE BLOODY JETS OFF.

I refused and almost drowned watching him using a frying pan to deposit bubbles in the sink, the bidet, the loo, the shower, the kitchen sink…..shame the windows don’t open 50 floors up (!?)