Apple Gatherers are HUGE knickers that cover a good third of a woman’s body. They are so called because they’re big enough to gather an orchard of apples in.

I’ve just found a wonderful pattern and I’m going to make myself a pair…to wear in public. Under the apron I’m making (as shown in the image above)

VerityHope patterns on Etsy.

Next on the list – fake tan to turn my white as milk legs golden brown (so much wrong with that statement) and a pair of pince-nez.

I have a wonderful grey streak in my dark hair, maybe I’ll grow a wart, moustache and a few hairs on my chinny chin chin too.

STFU. Today – ANYTHING GOES, yeah :o)